Ecstatic Play - Love's Languages

 "A relationship is a plant. The roots are in each of your hearts. The trunk and branches are the play of ordinary day to day life. The flowers and fruit are the sex and other ecstatic moments. Too many people aren't gardeners, they just go to the fruit or flower shop. Communication with yourself and others is the sap that allows the plant thrive.”

Relationships are based on communication. Intimacy is measured by how you share yourself. Effective and beautiful communication leads to trust, security, mutual empowerment and ecstasy. Intimacy is the sharing of minds, emotions and on how we manage differences. Also central is being really present, in the sense of giving your partners the attention of fascination. To do that we must know our minds so we can allow for our biases when listening to how other people's minds work with all our senses through their words, metaphors, sounds, actions, body language and energy/presence.

To me Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is about the power of language to transform your psychology and physiology and so is, like Tantra, about relationships – your relationship with yourself, with your body, with your life, with your play, your work, your friends and, most importantly, your lovers. These other relationships are important because how you love and do intimacy with lovers is expressed through all the other ways you relate to your life as a whole.

The sensitivities you learn in Tantra and NLP are part of each other, complementary, collaborative. Both experience the senses, all of them, as the windows to the soul, not just the eyes. Both ask you be very aware, empathise and understand people you're relating to both superficially and in deep intimacy. Both ask you to the cause in your life. That is, with insight you can choose how you relate, feel and behave with the events of your life whether or not you created them. Both understand how sensory imagination influences the flow of consciousness, the state of the body through the emotions and how you think.

The Chakras are away of managing the complexity of real life and all its relationships. One way we could fit Tantra and NLP together is that NLP fits in to the Fifth or Throat (communication) and the Sixth or Third Eye Chakras because it uses

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